IT is flooded with acronyms. It takes a third of our working life to figure out what they all mean. Protocols aren’t any easier to figure out if it’s just a string of three or four letters that look vaguely like a word. Which, by the way, you should never pronounce.

But what if the acronyms of our favorite protocols didn’t describe what the designers wanted but instead described what they actually do?

• Sporadic Network Mangling Protocol

• Obscurity Sends Packets Flying

• Expensive Invention Gets Routers Puzzled

• Vexing Router Firmware

• Really Intensive Protocol

• Someone Doesn’t Worry About Networking

• Somewhat Quixotic Language

• Blame It oN DNS

• Cisco’s Universal Call Misdirector

• Some Mail’s Thrown Places

• Mangles Packets, Looks Silly

• Amazingly Convoluted Lists

• ImProperly SECured

• May Push Lingering Sanity To Expire

Are there any other ones you can think of? Leave it in the comments.