Given how crazy everything is right now, it’s important to try and stay sane. And that’s harder than it sounds to be honest. Our mental health is being degraded by the day. Work stress, personal stress, and family stress are all contributing to a huge amount of problems for all of us. I can freely admit that I’m there myself. My mental state has been challenged as of late with a lot of things and I’m hoping that I’m going to pull myself out of this funk soon with the help of my wife @MrsNetwrkngnerd and some other things to make me happier.

One of the things that I wanted to share with you all today was one of the things I’ve been trying to be mindful about over the course of the last few months. It’s about appreciation. We show appreciation all the time for people. It’s nothing new, really. But I want you to think about the last time you said “thank you” to someone. Was it a simple exchange for a service? Was it just a reflex to some action? Kind of like saying “you’re welcome” afterwards? I’d be willing to bet that most of the people reading this blog post say those words more out of habit than anything else.

I decided I was going to change that. Instead of just mouthing an empty “thank you” for something, I decided to turn it into a statement of appreciation. As a father, I often tell my kids that they need to include statements in their apologies. Not just “I’m sorry” but “I’m sorry for hitting my brother”. Intent matters. In this case, the intent and appreciation is the opposite feeling.

So, instead of “thank you” I’ll say “Thank you for bringing me that cup.” Or maybe “Thank you for helping change that tire.” Calling out the explicit action that caused your thanks shows people that you’re being mindful of what they do. It means you’re paying attention and showing real gratitude instead of just being reflexive.

This can apply to technology as well. Instead of just a quick “Thanks” when someone completes a job, try making it specific. “Thanks for getting that routing loop figured out.” Or how about “Thanks for putting in the extra effort to get those phones deployed by the end of the day.” Do you see how each of these more specific statements are mindful of actions?

When you show people you appreciate them as much as what they do for you, you change the conversation. Appreciation is one of the most power gifts we can give other people. Validation and praise aren’t just meaningless platitudes. Show people you care may be the best connection they’ve had all day. Or all week. And all it takes is a little extra effort on your part. Take my word for it and try it yourself. For the next week, go the extra mile and explain why you’re thankful for people. You’d be surprised how far you’ll get.